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Helpless

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Do you ever get that feeling? That feeling where you look back, and you see all those things you could've done to prevent that disaster from happening, those things you could've done to avoid hurt and misunderstanding. That feeling where you were helpless.

Thousands of people, each day, suffer from hunger, disease, heart break, death. And yet I stand here. Helpless.

I try. I try to help, to comfort, to donate, to fundraise. And yet I stand here. Helpless. Helpless because those pain will never wash away, no matter how hard you try to help them forget, help them live a better life, those pain will be there, like an unwanted creature, gnawing at their heart.

I see them all, and I want to fix it. Fix everything. But the world is a bitter place, so yet I stand here. Helpless.

I see them, with their broken hearts and souls, with their eyes filled with pain. I want to help. To understand, to comfort, to tell you that it's ok, to tell you that I will be here for you, to tell you that the pain will go away. But deep down inside I know that you've gone through things I've never gone through before, so therefore no, I do not know it's going to be ok, I do not know that the pain will go away, and, most importantly, I do not know what you've been through, what it felt like.

And therefore I stand here. Helpless. Because all I can do is tell you I'll be here, but sometimes, sometimes that helps too. It helps to know that someone will be out there, looking out for you, someone who will protect you from the things you've been through.

Yet I stand here, feeling helpless. Because one day, I won't be here to help, I won't be here to comfort. Because the best I can do is tell you stuff that I know are lies, to tell you that the pain will go away, when most of the time it left you scarred, afraid. Afraid of hunger, disease, heart break, death. Afraid to go through those things you went through again.

But I stand here, and at last I see something that you don't see. I see you, unafraid, because you know this had happened, you know that in the end, you'll be ok, because you have been through them, and you have survived. I see you, a changed human being, fighting for what you believe in, comforting others that had been through the same thing you did, because you know the pain they felt.

So I stand here. Helpless.

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