I'm really not sure what this is. Enjoy.
To Jump or Not To Jump…Edit
On a ledge. Sam didn't think he would actually end up on the ledge. He was finally here. It was so ridiculous, he actually would have laughed if not for the gravity of the situation. No pun intended, of course. Far below, cars whizzed by and ant-like men crawled about, reminding him of the anthill full of ants that he used to nurture and protect until his drunken stepfather flattened it while attacking him. The ants disappeared after that, and he wept for days. Nobody noticed. He inched closer to the edge. "Out of my way," he heard a woman say, "you're blocking the beautiful view." He turned around and saw a girl, twelve years old, around his age, with a look of depression on her face covered by a stern, witty, rebellious look of stark determination. "Who are you?" Sam inquired. "Sarah," she replied, "what about you?" He nodded. "Sam." She nodded and shook his hand. "What are you doing here? Enjoying the view?" He shook his head. "I think I'm here the same reason you are." She nodded yes. They stood there for a moment. A breeze ruffled Sam's hair. "Why?" Sarah looked thoughtful for a moment and the cockiness started to wear off a bit. "You go first." Sam was about to refuse, but he noticed the pleading in her eyes. He thought about it, and he decided to go along with her. "It was my dad," he revealed, "well, my stepdad." Sarah nodded. "That story." "I barely remember my real dad," Sam confessed, "I was two when he died. I remember his smile. Mom says that he got shot because he was a Jew. Why do people do that? Who has the right to murder someone innocent, someone they don't even know, because of what they believe? Nobody. NOBODY!" Sam took a deep breath, leaning away from the drop below. Already, he could see people gathering and a faint cry of "JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!" rose from the streets. "Friendly, the people in New York," said Sarah with a hint of sarcasm. "Yeah," Sam laughed. He was silent for another moment. "Mom started drinking. She dated a total jerk. And then she married him." He sighed deeply. "He destroyed her," he growled, "he was a drunken monster. He reduced her to a frail shell who would follow his every command or he would punch her. He hated us. He was drunk all the time. When either of them even noticed me I got violently attacked. Mom never should have remarried." Suddenly, Sarah doubled over laughing. "Whats so funny?" She looked up. "Your problem was with your family? So was mine." She kept laughing, a harsh, painful, sarcastic laugh that betrayed extreme grief. "You know what they did? My dad left before I was even born. And then my mom took off right when I came out. They went to the same place." Her laughing was getting deeper and harsher. "Where did they go?" Sam asked, his curiosity piqued. Sarah's laughing was starting to sound more like sobbing. "Thats the thing," Sarah replied, "nobody knows! People around the world are saying different things about where they are now. Some people say they're in some kind of monstrous, horrible place because they weren't this faith or that faith. Other people tell me they're in paradise having a very good time thank you very much. A bunch of other people say they're just gone and… and I'll never get to… see them… or meet them…" By now Sarah was sobbing her heart out. "I've been bounced around the country… orphanage to orphanage… foster family to foster family, and… and none of them care… they just don't care… like… like your stepdad." She looked at him with new eyes. "You know… what its like… to be alone." Sam sighed. "You want to see your mommy." She nodded. The shouting was now easily audible. "JUMP! JUMP! JUMP! JUMP!" "You know," said Sam, "what if you jump and there's nothing there, because death is just the end and thats that? Believe me, I thought about this a long time and that was almost scarier than the idea of hell. What if thats just it?" Sarah rocked back and forth. "Shouldn't we find out?" Sam shook his head. "Look," he said, "I thought this was a good idea too. But look, past those skyscrapers there. Where the World Trade Centre used to be." Sarah did. "That ocean," Sam laughed, "look how huge it is! Can you see the other side?" Sarah shook her head. "That's the Atlantic," said Sam, "and it's only one of five oceans. The Indian Ocean is around the same size, maybe the Southern Ocean is bigger, but one ocean dwarfs them all. The Pacific takes up a quarter of the planet. Only two people - three, now - have been to the bottom. It's huge. And that is still just a small part of the planet. This planet, its so small! We are specks on an atom. There is such a huge universe of limitless potential. What if we can find a corner of that universe where we can actually belong?" Sam's defeated heart was full of hope. Sarah looked at him. And she smiled. Like his father once did. If one person could smile like that, the world wasn't such a bad place after all. "To jump or not to jump…" Sarah mused, "that is the question." Sam laughed. "Let's find the answer."
Even in a world where nothing makes sense and nothing is sacred, where everything can be destroyed if it makes an easy buck, what if there is still something out there worth living for? What if it isn't too late to save the pale blue dot we call home?